What’s In a Dress?

May I be so bold as to say I think a lot of wedding dresses are boring? This is not the same thing as the brides themselves; they are glimmering, beautiful, joy incarnate. I’m talking the dresses, on a hanger, far away from any sort of celebration of love or glowing bride. But as Mel Robbins loves to say: let them! Because I feel for brides, I really do. Not everyone can afford a bespoke creation spun from the wand of a wedding gown fairy godmother out of thin air. Weddings are only getting more expensive, with the price per head averaging $284. 

When I was a teenager watching reruns of Say Yes to the Dress on my parents’ couch, it was easy to be judgmental of the brides who, time and time again, insisted on trying on dresses thousands of dollars over budget. Now, I can understand it a lot more. It’s tempting to get starry-eyed over the thought of wearing the most unique, never-been-seen-before dress down the aisle, carefully stowing away the tight budget in the farthest corner of the mind. 

The Wall Street Journal published a piece recently titled, “The New Wedding Trend? A Used Dress.” It brought up the idea of an “Instagram wedding dress”—how bridalwear is all starting to look the same thanks to social media. The brides featured in this article, fed up with the proliferation of today’s looks, started turning instead to vintage options. One bride featured in the article found a Thierry Mugler suit from the ‘80s, priced at $2,000. Another discovered a nameless hourglass number from 1966 for $3,000. Point being, these are a far cry from the modern-day price tags that are upwards of $10,000 for polyester, only to look like Jane from next door. Vintage options are higher quality, and yes, more delicate and less size inclusive as well. But they are one of a kind, a feature many brides have their focus on. They’re also, oftentimes, a lot more budget-friendly. 

I should also mention I work part-time in the wedding industry. From a young age, I had a lot of exposure to weddings—I’m the youngest amongst many cousins and siblings. Combine this fact with the pop culturefication of bridal fashion and wedding culture (Sarah Dessen’s Once and for All, I’m looking at you), it’s safe to say this is an industry I’ve been circling long before I knew what a dress bustle even was. As a coordinator, I’ve seen my fair share of bridal looks. I can’t speak for every industry professional, but the final reveal never gets old, especially as someone who’s always had an appreciation for fashion. There have been two-piece suits, traditional ball gowns, allover lace designs, and satin minis. It’s one of my favorite parts of the job, seeing the bride in one of the most significant looks of her life. 

As far as celebrity wedding looks go, one of my (if not the only) favorites is Olivia Palermo, who wore custom Carolina Herrera with a cashmere cardigan overtop. She told Vogue about her aversion to looking too bridal-y, instead taking “every opportunity to turn everything into a fashion moment”. Palermo tied the knot in 2014, and everything about her look stands the test of time over a decade later. That’s what happens when you follow your inner North Star, not anyone else’s. 

Nothing says going your own way quite like a $35,000 custom couture gown for your wedding. Kidding, sort of. The designer is a lot more ubiquitous now, but I remember when Danielle Frankel first started becoming the name on everyone’s lips a few years ago. The designer’s structural, fashion-forward approach to wedding dress making changed the game. Non-traditional and modern are the quickest ways to put it; technical, individualistic, femininity reinvented are more significant identifiers of a DF silhouette. When you see one, you know. With her latest collection, she went even deeper down the textural rabbit hole. Collection X, inspired by Erté, a 20th-century Russian-French artist, included boned bodices (some with real flowers infused, by way of resin), hand-brushed silks, and other artful touches. I liked how the team worded it in the collection’s Instagram debut: “An ode to process. A dialogue between past and present.” May we all strive to form a dialogue between past and present with our wedding ‘fits, inspiring awestruck looks from our guests as we push boundaries with cascading heirloom-quality gowns. Whether we arrive at that point with polyester blends or custom organza, well, who’s to say?